Friday, February 19, 2010

Yes. I am one of the 16 people who still watch Survivor.

I have been watching Survivor for the past 10 years.

When it first came on, I was a little put off by it. I thought it was gimmicky and stupid, but since it first aired in the summer, when there was relatively little of interest new on TV, I watched it casually and I had to admit it was a little bit interesting. When the second season came on (Australia), I was back at college and my roommates wanted to watch, so it became part of our weekly Thursday night TV ritual.

I graduated college and decided that without my roommies watching with me, I would give up on Survivor, so I did not watch for a couple of seasons. But, eventually, something brought me back to it. Then, my friend Shanna became a regular watcher, and we decided to watch and discuss it together. Over the years, I moved away, then moved back to town, and she moved away, but we kept up our tradition of watching Survivor "together" via the wonders of the internet. We watch together every week (sometimes when it is first broadcast, sometimes time-shifted due to scheduling), and chat online with our comments and observations. A couple of years ago, we started sharing these chats with members of another, private online community, for our amusement (let's face it, random, stream-of-consciousness observations about episodes of Survivor are not everyone's cup o' tea).

Today, I am starting an experiment: Sharing our chats with you, the rest of the internet.

Behold our random, poorly typed/edited SURVIVOR CHAT for Survivor 20, Heroes vs. Villains, Episode 1!

me:doo doooooo
Shanna:the world's most BEAUTIFUL OCEAN
me:previously.... all these people were on survivor before. heh.
dun dun dunnnn
ominous helicopters
Shanna:hidden faces!
not hidden!
me:heh . as if anyone did not go online and see who was on this season.
me:I wish snarky Courtney was not a villain. although I think she'd rather be one than a hero.
Shanna:heh, "google it" [Russell says villains are smart, and then tells us to use google that fact]
I know. already russell is an ass.
Shanna:google "villians always win"
aww, james
me:and obsessed with apples
Shanna:awww, tom
me:lol. Boston Rob.
I kind of want to hug all of them.
I don't remember Sandra being that mean.
Shanna:man, can you imagine coming back after 10 years? [re: Colby commenting on it being almost 10 years since his first Survivor appearance]
cirie: nice ganster
me:Gangsta in an Oprah suit?
me:Colby is an actor now. He's gone far since his Survivor debut 10 years ago!

Shanna:lo lay lo lay lo lay la la
really, this season cannot suck as much as last season, no matter what

me:I would not want to sit in one of those scary copters.
Shanna:no! too open!
me:Oh, "Coach". posing already. douche.
Shanna:lol, russel is starstruck over boston rob
me:all the other Survivors are like "Who is this Russell a-hole?"
me:meh. Amanda. no, I don't know about the knot in your stomach before you bungee jump. thanks.
me:I know!!
Shanna:random OTHER helicopters
me:heroes! villains!!
Shanna:heh, pummeled with sand [the villain copters descend to the beach, where the heroes already have arrived, and get pelted with the stirred-up sand]
I love the villains making their entrances to the heroes.
Shanna:ah, i didn't realize there were 4 total helicopters
I kind of love the villains. I hate them, but I still want to hug them all.
me:I hope they all give Jeff shit.
Shanna:so, the villians all kind of wore red
but the heroes seem to have no theme
recent seasons they've tried to color code them, so I don't know what is up with that
Shanna:yeah, i've noticed that.... just find it weird they heroes are not all blue or something
me:Man. I am not on the Rupert train.
Shanna:i guess they kind of are
me:yeah. I was surprised they didn't make them all wear blue.
it is less obvious.
Shanna:yeah, rupert was nice in his season, but meh
me:he was kind of a whiny baby after a while.
dawww, JT
me:all the heroes are going to be all "ooh, perspective, noble blah blah bla" and the villains are so not going to be that way. :)
OMG that is awesome symbolism. Hee [Jerri is wearing a villainous black hat, Colby is wearing a heroic white one]
me:Blindsides does not equal being a villain!
Shanna:heh, courtney
Shanna:yeah, really!
me:Jeff, I am bored with this. move on. [he keeps talking to the Survivors about being back, blah blah blah fishcakes]
Shanna:yeah, time to move on
me:I think Boston Rob has a point. I'll give the villains the early advantage.
i think there are plenty of egos on the villians
me:but they will have other, crazier ego problems!!
me:ooh, challenge! [first challenge time!]
Shanna:they all know fire is important
Shanna:remember, jeff, they have PLAYED BEFORE
he will! at tribal!
we will get the speech!
bouncy cirie
me:yeah, I know, I know.
Parvati is badass
me:hee. boobs.
me:nice take down cirie!
Shanna:this is crazy
I love this.
I would love to watch this in a group, like at a bar
Shanna:aww, steph [in a lot of pain, having her shoulder dislocated already in the battle!]
me:injuries already!
Shanna:no wonder! that was rough!
eh, just pop it back in
me:no shit. they are trying to kill these people already!
Stephenie is one of the few wearing a sensible swimsuit top, too
Shanna: yeah, she knows the drill [the medics are putting her shoulder back in]
me:Jeff is helping
yuck. that was a nice sound effect. [horrible popping sound which may have been real, but I want to believe the editors embellished a bit]
Shanna:jeff is like, DAYUM
me:I think Jeff is a little turned on by that.
jerri also has a sensible suit
unlike amanda
randy and jt
Shanna:go jt go!
me:I am not surprised by that outcome.
ooh, new strategy. "Coach" playing defense
Shanna:he's [Jeff] like, i have to keep talking because it is taking them a long time to find it
me:oops. didn't work, though.
Shanna:pile of guys
lol, dragging coach
me:I think coach was just feeling Colby up a little
Shanna:play fair! [Jeff says… schoolmarmishly, but I don’t think very sincerely. He loves the rough play.]
me:awww, no way [Coach lets Colby drag him all the way and then scores the point!]
Shanna:oh tyson
me:oh, Tyson is still an ass
Shanna:i hate that guy as much now as i did before
me:Sugar vs Courtney!
these are all the tiny women.
Shanna:he just plays up his assholery
go ladies!
go sugar!
me:I don't think they can even lift the damn bag.
me:they are all scrappy little women
me:Sandra undid Sugar's top! hee
Shanna:undid her top?
go sugar!
Lol [Sugar does not let Sandra undoing her top stop her, and she decides to grab the bag, sprint topless to the mat for the point, and do a double-fisted flip-off in topless victory!]
me:she is a pinup model. she rules
that was awesome
Shanna:best fight ever
me:I want to rewatch that later
I think James should just hold down his two opponents at the same time.
he could do it.
Shanna:go james!
yay heroes! [They win reward!]
me: yay!!
me:aww, be sad Rupert [I did not know why he was sad]
me:oh, he's injured. my bad
Shanna:beat them up right away
me:I thought he was sad about something.
meh, just a toe.
me:relocated shoulder
me:I give that win to Sugar. Heh.

[back at camp after commercial]
me:I am glad the tribe names are not kooky native words
Shanna:heh, for once
me:I think I will like the villains teasing each other and being crazy
me:I am already sick of Russell.
Shanna:who the heck is danielle
me:she apparently was on Exile Island
me:I sort of remember her.
Who does Russell think he is? You know? blerg. [being all about being awesome and finally playing with people smart enough for him and how he’s the best and all that nonsense]
Shanna:lol, russell. gettin in with the ladies again
these ladies should be smarter
me:I don't know about this Danielle, but Parvati is smarter than Russell for sure.
Shanna:ok, thank you parvati
me:she knows how to play him.
triumphant hero music!
[at the heroes camp]
Shanna:collaborative decision making!
Shanna:very hero like
me:its all rainbows and unicorns at the hero tribe
and chickens!
Shanna:goofy music!
it will be fun to watch them with a chicken
me:how are there chickens there?
Shanna:people are not good at catching chickens
me:did Shambo leave them on the island??
or maybe they are island chickens
me:surround the chickens!!
Shanna:better than "chase them!"
me:lol. yay! they got the dumbass chickens!
me:I think the producers set them loose for the heroes

[Villain Camp]
me:oh, I'm sure you had forgotten your awesomeness, "Coach"
they needed to remind you [Coach says something about how he’d forgotten about how awesome he was pwning Colby at the challenge, but his tribe kept talking about it… yeah]
me:ewww. Jeri hearts Coach!
Shanna:they look like they should be together
me:ewww. and Coach hearts Jerri@!
Didn't Coach have a girlfriend?
Shanna:1st survivor romance of the season
me:the villains are going to be awesomely relentless with each other [They are already playfully teasing each other, since they are the meanie, taunting villains!]
Shanna:his girlfriend probably left him after he got a big survivor head
see, JT was also a big double dealer but that did not make him a villain
they all had to do that kind of thing and blindside people.
me:it is interesting how some of them have played together and how that works out
it is also very interesting how they are actually strategizing for real now, since they have learned
me:final tribal will be very interesting
Shanna:for sure
it will be interesting to see who makes it far
it has been SIX years since Boston Rob played??
holy shit
time flies!
me:Boston Rob has the work ethic [he complains everyone is just hanging around, posing, etc, and they need to try to make fire and not have a bad shelter]
uh. you CAN make fire without flint, dude. [Randy scoffs and whines at Rob suggesting they try to make fire without winning fire tools, etc]
Randy is such a whiny ass
Shanna:yeah, that guy is annoying
me:I would love to see Boston Rob triumph at this
Shanna:go boston rob
me:they are all watching like it is a miracle [Boston Rob successfully builds a fire-making doohickey and makes fire!!]
nice job
Shanna:it is kind of cute that he and amber are still married
not like, a quickie reality romance
it has to work out sometimes!
Coach is a Boston Rob fanboy
Russell is jealous!
I hope he gets voted out first.
Shanna:yeah, maybe russell was so pissed at tribal for last season because of how he performed this season
that's what i was thinking, too

[Back at camp Heroes]
me:I think it is hard to break a toe in multiple places. [Rupert goes on about how his toe is broken in 3 places or something, and then spends a zillion years wasting their magnesium and flint unsuccessfully making fire]
Oh, Rupert. don't waste the magnesium and flint!
he's got a martyr complex
Shanna:man, try to sound A LITTLE MORE EXCITED [Someone else makes fire, Rupert does not seem grateful]
me:he's Eeyore

[Camp Villains]
me:Boston Rob totally knows all their egos. heh.
Shanna:so funny
me:He will play them.
IRON SHARPENS IRON [Coach wants to be BFFs with Boston Rob]

Sugar is on the prowl
Shanna:awww, colby is like not interested
me:I think Colby gave the brushoff to Jerri during their first season, too, which sort of played into her villain-ness
me:are they going to waste a chicken this early?
ugh. JT killed that chicken with his bare hands!
sexy! ... not really

Shanna:oh, well, they got fire on their own
which makes them a little more awesome
damn, that was a snarky tree mail
I hope the villains lose and vote off Russell
srsly, I would rather any of the other villains stay longer

[Immunity Challenge!]
me:I want them to be all BOOYEAH WE HAVE FIRE TOO [Jeff is asking the questions, talking about how much awesomer the heroes must be right now since they already won fire, but the villains do not tip their hand that they are not doing too terribly]
but they didn't.
they are keeping expectations low
Shanna:yeah, i am surprised he didn't mention it
ahh, true
me:it is smart
part of this magical 20th season apparently involves Jeff reminding us which players have done these challenges before
he is like, look, we can't keep coming up with new challenges
me:and instead of just hoping we forget about some of the recycled challenges, now it is special since they are all allstars
me:I hope we get to hear lots of snarky asides and comments during the challenges
there needs to be a drinking game for this season. how many times Jeff calls it the 20th season and stuff
oh damn
me:oh, heroes. you are dumb. [they had a huge lead and then choked on the puzzle, giving the Villains the win]
well, I guess Russell won't be voted out
my guess is Sugar. she has annoyed everyone already and is crying.
Shanna:yeah :(
me:but they could be trying to make it too obvious to us.
Shanna:boo, i still like her
but someone needs to go
me:could be Rupert, too, I guess
ooh, snap, Colby.
Shanna:oh jeez, didn't you watch her season? she is not having an emotional breakdown, this is just how she is

[Villain camp]
me:thanks for explaining that, Sandra. yes, you don't want to lose immunity so someone has to go home
Shanna:yeah, that was ILLUMINATING
me:hah. they have a see saw at the villain camp [which Russell was playing on with Coach]

I want Rupert to go home.
Shanna:me too
ooh, why Amanda? [someone suggests her]
Shanna:yeah, that was random
me:because she's a threat and has a lot of potential alliances already?
ooh, good point Tom. [about Cirie being a threat]
But I don't want Cirie to go!
I love the real strategizing at this point.
Shanna:me either, but tom is TOTALLY right
me:and I love that Tom recognizes how awesome Cirie was
Shanna:for once!
Shanna:someone is smart!
at the beginning!
who cares if someone is weak and whiny? they will love you forever if you let them stay [re: Sugar, I think]
me:heh. yeah. that's what will make this season awesome. they've all learned from being on before, except Russell still thinks he is the best.
me:I love Cirie still.
they all know each others' strengths and weaknesses
Shanna:i love all these players!
i keep being like, NOOO
just lose rupert
me:I love how the America's Sweetheart and FavoriteSurvivor, Sugar and Rupert, are now the most hated/annoying ones
the narrative has already been completely flipped

[Tribal Council!!]
me:Is it because fire represents life? hmm?? yes!
he's like, i am contractually obligated to say that line
Shanna:lol, no roof on tribal?
me:Now when Jeff brings up these questions, it isn't like he's feeding ideas to the players like usual. they actually have thought about this stuff.
I hate how Jeff still seems shocked Cirie is a threat.
Shanna:yeah, really
me:Steph is still the hardcore strength/challenge voter. she's still got the athlete mentality.
me:No, you can't just pick one person to vote out if there were 4 people who sucked at the puzzle part. it wasn't one person's fault.
me:ooh, nice answer Candace. it is hard to do the puzzle! [she says you can’t blame them for losing because it is brave of them to try and then no one will volunteer to do puzzles if you blame them]
me:I think Tom as lying a little bit there. he's not about keeping the tribe strong. he wants to vote based on long term strategy! [threats like Cirie and aligning with another winner, JT, for a chance at the end]
I don't want any of them to leave. I like the dynamic we have!
Shanna:maybe by "keeping the tribe strong" he means weeding out strategizers who aren't on his side
me:I think he was doublespeaking there, yeah.
they should really be keeping in mind that she [Sugar] won the first challenge for them by taking off her top
boooooooo [and… Sugar is gone]
me:well, duh.
I agree. she was badass in that first challenge.
so sad
she should have been less annoying I guess.
me:at least she has that awesome moment from the first challenge. now we have sad sack Rupert to have hanging around for a while.

[on the next….]
next time.... someone Boston Rob collapses!!!
he looks dead!!!!
sugar is like, yeah, they probably did the right thing
and i want to get some clothes on!
I only got the first few seconds of her goodbye
we didn't get to hear anyone's voting comments this time around
too many comments, so little time
me:probably also because it was obvious
me:well, that was a fun first episode
looks like it will be a fun season

So... I think it will be a good one. As we've said before, it can't be any worse than last season, which was annoying and not exciting. And "knowing" these Survivors already, and them having a chance to change our minds about them for better and worse (as seems to always happen when there are repeaters) will be interesting!

Here is something that I pulled from the TWoP recap of last episode which sums up why I think I'll like watching the "Villains" tribe more than I would normally expect to like them based on their individual seasons: Night 1 at the Villains camp, the tribe makes fun of Rupert. Ha! Jerri says he merely "stubbed" his toe, while Randy does an impression of him. Douche reminisces about his stunning victory over Colby, although he claims in an interview that while he'd "forgotten" about his impressive display, his tribe couldn't stop thinking about it. Jerri, with her past with Colby, naturally gravitates towards Douche, her new hero. Say what? She interviews that she wants to get to know him better while snuggling up beside him to sleep. NOOO! Not Jerri! Also, what happened to Douche's ladyfriend from the finale? Douche interviews that he is also interested in Jerri, who is a "different kind of girl" to his "different kind of guy." Randy, meanwhile, laughs at them. The next morning, the camp is abuzz about Douche and Jerri's blossoming romance. Douche actually smiles goofily when Li'l Russell and Parvati tease him about it, which makes him -- as much as I hate to say it -- kind of endearing. Meanwhile, Sandra and Courtney tease Jerri about Douche. I think Courtney's just doing it because she likes calling Douche "the Dragonslayer" and then laughing.

The "villains" may be annoying on their individual seasons, but dump a bunch of them together, knowing each others' back stories and Survivor personalities? Golden, I say!


  1. Perhaps next time you should leave my name in there, though - it's even harder to follow when my lines are not connected with my name! :)

  2. Ack! I have to fix that. I don't know what happened. It was there before!

  3. Okay. Fixed! (Dumb formatting/copy/paste error.)