Thursday, March 4, 2010

Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains, episode 3 (or: Parvati Shallow - She's Magically Flirtatious)

me: ok!
survivor time!
Shanna: ok!
me: previously: "the heroes were heroic, and the villains were villainous"... really, Jeff?

OMG Russell did NOT rope in Parvati! She said right after that she doesn't trust him but will go along with him. That is strategy, not being roped in!!!!
Shanna: that schtick is going to get old - "JT embraced the darkside because he PLAYED THE GAME
me: yeah. fuck that shit

[Heroes coming back from previous Tribal Council]
Shanna: rat!
growing mushrooms!
me: that was weird. the mushrooms.
ugh, James has no idea why people did not respond well to his attitude.
Shanna: yeah
me: Good for Tom trying to be a diplomat. [He tells James he could have been gentler with the way he handled Stephenie, but it is good things got out in the open, I think?]
Shanna: seriously. how is that possible?!?!
me: ha. JT and tom hug it out. I think they are realistic about how this game goes, though.
Shanna: yeah. i like them both. tom especially, i remember i totally liked him in his season too
he is just so good all the time
such a HERO!
me: Yes. It is damn naive to think it is going to be all fair and stuff, Tom. Geez.

[Villain Camp]
me: eww, who is Parvati snuggling with?
why are they giggling?
Shanna: i was just going to say the same thing!
me: are they high??
Shanna: russell??????
it seems like it!!
me: boooo
eww, Coach was touching Jerri's hair.
like, in a creepy way, briefly
Wait. Isn't Russell married?
Shanna: maybe they had a big breakup and THAT is why russ was mad at tribal [lest season]
huh, yeah!
me: I love how Rob is the "wise observer" now. [he remarks that you can tell everything about people’s alliances by who they are sleeping next to]
Shanna: hee
someone has to be!

me: Rupert wants to do team building. [He said he was hoping for a rainy day so they could all play games and stuff together]
I have a suggestion: fucking BE A TEAM.
Shanna: chasing chickens again
me: you don't need games and exercises... this whole thing IS that for REAL
bok bok bok bok
I think the chicken would prefer not to be chased, dude [I think Colby said something about how the chicken had a choice, to either stay still and be caught or be chased, and it was silly]
Shanna: heh
blah, rupert
me: chicken chasing = bonding
Shanna: "it was SUPPOSED to happen!" [I… don’t remember what this was about]

Shanna: blah
me: Whoa. Is COACH being the reasonable, wise one right now? [He is telling Russell how dangerous it is to be connected with Parvati and under her spell]
What universe is this?????
Parvati is charming.
Shanna: heh, totally! he didn't even say she was a dragoness who needed slaying!
me: LOL
Shanna: this angle makes coach's nose look really big
me: ooh, Maybe Russe’l at the last finale, even though he was married, was in a triangle with Parvati!
Russell, please do not call yourself anyone's daddy
Shanna: heh
oh, parv [She calls herself sweet and innocent]
me: Ah, Parv. so funny
Shanna: you are anything but sweet and innocent
me: why is he talking about hooking up with her? ick.
Shanna: seriously, i really thought he was married
so, what's up with that
me: srsly. didn't he have a family at the last finale, which happened AFTER this season taped? shenanigans!

[more at Villains camp]
me: is this Coach's storytelling time? [he is telling everyone a fantastical kayaking adventure story of his, and other Villains are teasing him about it]
Russell is now hiding the machete??? What is wrong with that dude?
Shanna: he is so crazy. he just likes to do crazy shit
ooh burn you like the astros! burn! [He also says the next thing that he’s going to mess with is Rob’s Boston Red Sox hat, and he’s all, to paraphrase, “boo, Red Sox! Yay, Astros!”]
me: isn't there really a rule against stealing people's shit and messing with it?
Shanna: what
it seems like there should be!
me: LOLOLOL [Coach is doing his poses and SINGING]
Shanna: hehehe
me: it was a Coach interlude
no one wants to share Randy's clam [Randy has caught a giant clam, tries to share]
Shanna: man, you know there is abundance of food if no one wants any clam
me: yup
this is like glamorous survivior, with the chickens and stuff all around.
are they eating it raw? [Sandra does take some, and Parvati does too but doesn’t like it and spits it out]
Shanna: it is UNJUST when people do nothing! UNJUST! (I agree it is unfair, but that is funny)
me: oh, the injustice of Survivor!!!! [Coach going on about people sunbathing and being lazy and yet still do well in the game]

oh, good for Candice at least trying to make a smart alliance now. [talking with JT]
Shanna: strategical!
me: heh
JT was a big liar last time, too. [He goes from talking to Candice to telling Cirie that Candice doesn’t trust her!]
he and nerdy Stephen made up stories and backstabbed all along!
Shanna: yeah, and he is so down home good boy that no one really suspects
me: but he's a HEROOOOO
Oh, Candice, do you expect whoever said that to come clean?? [Cirie has asked her if she doesn’t trust her, and now Candice is going around to find out who is spreading such lies!]
Shanna: god damn. shut up james [He’s scolding Candice to calm down about it.]
your voice
is makes me want to stab you
me: totally
how has that guy been on survivor 3 times now. all he wants to do is play challenges and have nothing to do with the rest of the game
Shanna: yeah

[Reward/Immunity Challenge time!]
james is like, yay mud wrestling! i like physical challenges!
me: yeah
they stlil have luxury items??? [reward is coffee and luxury items, and also immunity]
they haven't mentioned those since years ago
Shanna: yeah, i don't know if they ever get them in other recent seasons!
me: wait, didn't courtney sit out last time? isn't there a rule against sitting out two in a row?
Shanna: they seem to have changes of clothes this time (and i think a little in recent seasons too)
or at least swimuits and regular clothes and some layering items
[The challenge is super physical, and basically involves knocking an opponent off of the platform into the mud using a padded bag thing]
me: ha. russell was housed by tom
they used to have a few clothing options in australia, I remember
ha. nice
Jeff, don't call him the dragon slayer!!!
Shanna: heh, jeff is like, we need to bring back that dragonslayer stuff. that was awesome. anyone? dragonslayer?
me: lol
do over! [There’s this rule where both hands have to be on the bag to win, and you can’t use other parts of your body to knock someone off… I think they were a little liberal with it sometimes but then made Coach and Rupert have a do-over]
Shanna: heheheh
me: ooh, he flipped of jeff! and jeff called rupert the pirate;. what?
this is hysterical
me: LOL
Shanna: hahahaha
me: ooh, Jerry v Cirie is a good one
aww, disappointing
Shanna: cirie is a powerhouse
me: Cirie is a bruiser, though.
that was kind of obvious
Shanna: i would be afraid to go against her!
me: me too
Shanna: woot!
me: I keep forgetting stupid Tyson is there
Shanna: the heroes need a win
yeah, i am glad he isn't important
me: amanda and danielle are indistinguishable right now
Shanna: although the longer [Tyson] is in the background the longer he will be around
me: true
Shanna: this looks SO painful
me: slippery!
Shanna: rob did some amazing maneuvers to stay on there
me: no kidding
Shanna: all for naught, but still
me: James v Randy? really?
that is silly
Shanna: lol
me: hmm, who didn't see THAT coming? [James knocks Randy off with one push]
Shanna: i mean, that was ridiculous [Also, James then threw the bag down at Randy’s face]
me: yeah
1) it was totally a mismatch in size. 2) James didn't have to smash him like that
Shanna: i love how they are like "randy, fight dirty!" and when james just pwns him without any effort (or foul play) they are like, you are a villain, james! [Courtney said James was on the wrong Tribe]
me: heh.
no kidding. very true.
although, how else could Randy have played in that situation? I don't think purely strength was an option! heh.
Shanna: i mean, he didn't have to smash him so hard, i guess, but i think that is probably how hard he hits anyway

me: aww, poor defeated villains.
group bath! [Getting all the mud from the challenge off each other]
steroid sandwiches. how clever, Tyson
they all sort of seem to love bathing each other.
ha. Coach still says he doesn't lie.
Shanna: blah blah blah coach being all "i know what is up"
me: OMG Coach stop making sense. I do not want to have to stop thinking you are ridiculous!
Shanna: hee, yeah, he actually DOES know what is going on [Talking about voting Parvati out, and how he won’t let her charms work on him, although he does this while enjoying flirting with her in the water]
me: okay, he still is ridiculous. but less so sort of.
I don't want Parv to go, but they SHOULD vote her out. come on.
srsly. Parvati has magical charisma flirting powers
Shanna: but you can still be annoyed at him because he sounds so self-righteous when he says it
me: Sandra looks good now. she looks younger than a few years ago on her season, doesn't she?
ooh Boston Rob was spying
ugh, Jerri, you can't go to the others to change their vote without having an alternative. Durrrr
[Jerri is lobbying to NOT vote out Randy, as the others seem to want to do, but when Parv asks her who she’d vote out instead, she’s all “I don’t have to answer!”… because she totally wants Parv out, who she called a virus during an interview]
Shanna: yeah, that's what i though too, about sandra!
me: Fakey McGee! [Parvati re: Jerri]
Shanna: hehehe
me: Bitter Old Cougar!
Shanna: lol
no one is honorable
me: oh, there's the old Coach we know and laugh at
here it is
me: do not quote MLK! [Coach talks about honor blah blah blah fishcakes BUT THEN, icing on the cake, quotes Martin Luther King, Jr, who I’m sure just spun in his grave]
Shanna: meaningful quotes
sweeping, dramatic music
hahaha lol coach, don't ever change
me: I bet Coach compares himself to Rosa Parks in real life
Shanna: I WILL FIGHT FOR HIM [Coach re: Randy, not Martin Luther King, Jr. or Rosa Parks]

[Villains at Tribal Council]
Shanna: why get fire jeff?
me: fire is life!
Shanna: oh right
me: LOL
Shanna: FIRE is LIFE
me: I am choking from laughing and swallowing wrong at the same time
ooh, I'm surprised Jeff asked Sandra that question for some reason. [about the threat of preexisting relationships]
like, she is not one of his pets
is Jerri trying to say Randy is an asset for their physical strength? [she talks about other reasons to keep someone… and since she had been lobbying to keep Randy, this seems like a silly answer to me]
Shanna: lol, sandra's last move there, with the big wide arms, was hilarious
me: Ah, Sandra. just the way she was before. not keeping her mouth shut
Shanna: worst shelter in survivor history!
me: I love that they are having a "worst shelter in history" competition [Someone, I think Coach, complained about how everyone isn’t working well together so their shelter is so bad, and Jerri and Courtney are both all “um, I think we have endured even WORSE shelters”]
I love the way Sandra just lets it all hang out
[someone mentions being machete-less]
I bet Jeff totally is thinking "Russell stole the machete. Anyone missing any burnt socks, too?"
I like Parvati more than Randy, but it would be smarter to send Parv home I think
Shanna: yeah, exactly
random rob vote
me: yeah. random.
Shanna: looks like randy [all votes for Randy, except Randy’s random vote for Rob]
me: huh
Shanna: sounds like jeff stumbled over "hereoes vs villians" there
me: what did he throw in the fire?
oh, his buff
this episode was not as exciting as I'd hoped. oh well. last week's was way more dramatic, hard to live up to it
Shanna: yeah
i was kinda bored with it this week
ah well
me: next time.... Coach cries.
hidden idol. Russell is dumb
Shanna: and they are sick of russell!
and for some reason heroes think they should look for hidden idols as a tribe!
me: Wow. that was pretty crazily unanimous. no one voted for Parv.
yeah, the heroes are pretty dumb
Shanna: she is too charming to be voted out!
me: Courtney did a little dance when she voted out her old nemesis Randy. heh
I kind of want to be friends with Parvati
I don’t think we'd be real life good friends, but she'd be like the fun work friend girl, you know?
didn't she start charming all the girls, too, last time? like srsly she has magical powers
Shanna: yeah
she does have a cute smile and a sweet voice
i guess it works well for her!
me: heh

No comments:

Post a Comment